Kiss the job goodbye

Smooching has hit the headlines recently, complicating the lives of HR managers of the various organisations involved.

There’s a been a whole thing around Sainsbury’s in Brighton, where two women were thrown out of the store by a security guard for kissing in the aisles. Sainsbury’s was quick to apologise, and also (understandably) extremely quick to point out that the guard in question was technically in the employ of someone else.

In London, a gay couple complained that they were kicked off the No. 89 bus to Blackheath by a driver who objected to their public display of affection. (The driver allegedly said, ‘Oi you two don’t do that on my f****** bus or you can get off, I don’t want to watch that.’) A ‘thorough investigation’ into the incident is being conducted by the bus company concerned, Go-Ahead.

Then, two police officers in Tanzania were fired by superiors for being photographed kissing in uniform. A social media frenzy (is there now any other kind?) erupted, but as the BBC reported, the decision is unlikely to be subject to a successful challenge, as the kissing is considered a clear breach of the officers’ code of conduct.

The more you look into it, the more you realise that kissing in public (or in the office, for that matter) is a tricky issue to negotiate. There are those with a phobia of kissing – Phileamphobia, it’s called – which is often traceable to insecurities around transfer of germs. (With the hysteria around Ebola, this phobia might be entering a boom period.) And many cultures, particularly those with strong Muslim or Buddhist values, discourage all forms of public displays of affection. In 2004, for example, Indonesia passed a law that meant heavy kissing in public could result in five years in prison or a $29,000 fine.

Perhaps the safest way is to prohibit kissing altogether, certainly in the workplace. Back in 2011, The German Etiquette Society proposed a total ban on office kissing. As reported in the Telegraph at the time:

Hans-Michael Klein, chairman of the group, told the Times: “There should be no kissing, at least not in the office… The suspicion for many remains that there is, or may be, an erotic component to the kissing…Kissing simply gets on the nerves of many at work. It is a form of terror.”

Ah, the complex kiss: what Ingrid Bergman described as ‘the messenger of love and tenderness’ is also, to some fellow across the Baltic, a ‘form of terror.’ Organisations had indeed best ban it now, before kissing becomes the big complaint on everybody’s lips.

About the author

Andrew Baird

Andrew is the CEO of HRville. He is also Employer Brand Director of Blackbridge Communications, Editorial Director of Professionals in Law and an associate of The Smarty Train. Previously, he was the MD of TCS Advertising.