Well-oiled
An oil trader was sacked by his employer after a business trip to Singapore turned boozy. Dereliction of responsibility – or fair play?The Villain felt a rare pang of sympathy this week, for the subject of a big employment news story. Andrew Kearns, an oil trader, was sacked by his employer Glencore UK after a business trip to Singapore turned so boozy it left him unable to do any actual work.
Kearns was seeking damages for unfair dismissal after Glencore gave him the boot for failing to turn up to a series of meetings on the trip. Glencore accused Kearns of staying out until 4.30am (a charge Kearns was honest enough to admit), leaving him incapable the following day.
Kearns’ defence of ‘the Singapore incident’ was that he hadn’t indulged to a greater extent than people he was with, and that on previous, similar (boozy) events he had struck up lucrative relationships with clients. He argued that long lunches and late nights were an important part of the trading scene.
However, that wasn’t enough for Glencore, who called him an habitual drinker, and Kearns lost his claim.
This judgment suggests, tragically, that the days of the liquid lunch might be over.
Yes, you read that correctly. The Villain is currently donning a black armband in its memory.
But in this teetotal brave new world, how will commodities traders – and all the other Square Mile-dwelling, pinstriped Loadsamoneys – ever get clients to sign on the dotted line without getting them drunk first? It’s a chilling proposition. They’ll have to learn to sell, present, articulate basic thoughts, all that stuff. In short, simple work skills that don’t involve simply putting a card behind the bar. Let’s hope they can manage it.
Finally, according to reports of the case, a relevant factor in the ruling was Mr Kearns’s failure to accept help Glencore had previously offered, involving a doctor and a consultant on drug and alcohol addiction. Instead, Kearns spent the next afternoon, when he should have been at work, in the pub.
And that’s where The Villain’s sympathy started to run out.
Still, at least stewards everywhere will be pleased there’s a new profession to describe how inebriated somebody might be. “As pissed as an oil trader” has quite the ring to it.
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